The Special Ed Advocate Newsletter
November 18, 2002

Issue - 188

ISSN: 1538-3202

In this Issue

How to Resolve Disputes: Negotiate, Mediate or Litigate

Play Hearts, Not Poker / 8 Steps to Better IEP Meetings

Strategies for Mediations & Negotiations

How to Disagree with the School Without Starting WW III

Success Story: How to Get Services by Asking Questions

Need Help? Visit the Yellow Pages!

How to start a FETA group

Subscribe & Contact Info

Your Email:

Your Name & Zipcode:

At Wrightslaw, our goals are to help you gain the information and skills you need to navigate the confusing world of special education. In this issue, we look at effective advocacy for children with disabilities.

Highlights: Resolving disputes by negotiation, mediation or litigation; strategies in mediations and negotiations; 8 Steps to better IEP meetings; how to disagree with the school without starting WW III; how to get services by asking (the right) questions; help from Yellow Pages for Kids.

Online version of newsletter: https://www.wrightslaw.com/advoc/nwltr/2002/nl.1118.htm

The Special Ed Advocate newsletter is free! Please forward this issue or the subscription link to your friends and colleagues so they can learn about special education law & advocacy too. Many thanks!


Yellow Pages Flyers! Download and distribute your state Yellow Pages Flyer from http://www.fetaweb.com/help/state.flyers.htm

1. How to Resolve Special Education Disputes: Negotiate, Mediate or Litigate

At the beginning of this new article, Pete and Pam Wright ask several questions. As you answer these questions, you will understand why conflict between parents and schools is normal, predictable and inevitable.

Learn how to use negotiation, mediation and litigation to resolve disputes - along with the pros and cons of each in How to Resolve Special Education Disputes: Negotiate, Mediate or Litigate at:


More mediation articles & resources: https://www.wrightslaw.com/info/mediation.index.htm

2. Play Hearts, Not Poker by Jennifer Bollero, Esq.

To learn why mediation seems to be a game of poker, but is actually a game of hearts, read Play Hearts, Not Poker by Jennifer Bollero.

Ms. Bollero writes from the unique perspective of an attorney who is also the parent of a child with autism. She teaches parents how to negotiate better IEPs for their children and offers insights and practice tips for attorneys and paralegal advocates who represent parents and children with disabilities. Play Hearts, Not Poker includes "Eight Steps to Better IEP Meetings" -


Beacon Archives: http://www.harborhouselaw.com/archives.htm

Subscribe to The Beacon: http://www.harborhouselaw.com/newsletter.html

3. Tactics & Strategies in Mediations & Negotiations by Dee Alpert, Esq.

Dee Alpert has litigated federal class action sex discrimination employment suits, administrative sex and race discrimination proceedings, and special education cases. Read Ms. Alpert's advice about positions, offers, and dealing with "junk tactics" and learn the advantages of mediation over litigation.

Read Tactics & Strategy in Mediations and Negotiations at:


For more articles about mediation & negotiation, read The Beacon: The Journal of Special Education Law and Practice at:


4. How to Disagree with the IEP Team - Without Starting WW III

Pete answers questions about IEPs and teaches you how to disagree with the IEP team without starting World War III. Learn about the Rules of Adverse Assumptions, how to use tape recording and thank you letters to clarify issues, along with tips to deal with a team bully.

Read How to Disagree with the IEP Team at:


For more articles about advocacy strategies, visit the Advocacy Page at:


5. Success Story: How I Learned to Get Services by Asking (the Right) Questions

"When I began to advocate for my daughter, I supported requests with tons of documentation. I was surprised when the "powers that be" would not provide the services and supports. Why was I having this problem? What could I do? Then I realized that the educators viewed me as a 'Know it All Parent' . . ."

If you are battling the school about services for your child, you need to read this article!

Learn about perceptions, "Know-It-All Parents", and simple strategies you can use to improve your relationship with school personnel -- and get services for your child. Read How I Learned to Get Services by Asking Questions at:


Do you like success stories? We do! You can read more success stories at: http://www.fetaweb.com/success.htm

6. Looking for Help? Visit the Yellow Pages!

"We just moved to Houston and need to find a pediatric neurologist for our child with autism - please help."

"I am looking for a parent support group in Portland Oregon - please help."

We built the Yellow Pages for Kids with Disabilities so you can get reliable information and support. When you visit your state Yellow Pages, you will find many different resources - evaluators, tutors, advocates, consultants, programs, attorneys, and support groups.


Yellow Pages Flyers

Help us get the word out about the new Yellow Pages! Download a general Yellow Pages Flyer or the flyer for your state. Please distribute your state Yellow Pages Flyer at schools, day care centers, libraries, doctor's and psychologist's offices, community centers, and hospitals.


Do you have a website? Please link to your state Yellow Pages! Download Yellow Pages images.

7. How to Start a FETA Study Group

Wrightslaw: From Emotions to Advocacy (FETA) by Pete & Pam Wright teaches parents, educators, and others how to advocate for kids with disabilities. Pete & Pam built a companion website for the FETA book at Fetaweb.com to enhance your learning of advocacy skills and strategies.

  "I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand." - Confucius   

But the best way to learn is by doing - and by teaching others. In How to Start a FETA Study Group, you learn to -

* Recognize and resolve problems early
* Get free publicity for your group
* Manage members' emotions & stay on task


50% Discount on Wrightslaw Books

Interested in starting a FETA Group? Save 50% on bulk purchases of Wrightslaw books. Get free shipping too! For more info, go to:


8. Subscription & Contact Info

The Special Ed Advocate is a free online newsletter about special education legal and advocacy issues, cases, tactics and strategy, and Internet resources. Subscribers receive announcements and "alerts" about new cases, events, and special offers on Wrightslaw books. 

Subscribe: https://www.wrightslaw.com/subscribe.htm

Newsletter Archives: https://www.wrightslaw.com/archives.htm

Seminars & Training: https://www.wrightslaw.com/speak/index.htm

Need Help? Visit your state Yellow Pages for Kids with Disabilities

Link to Us Help spread the word about special education advocacy - download a banner or image:


Wrightslaw & The Special Ed Advocate
ISSN: 1538-3202
Pete and Pam Wright
P. O. Box 1008
Deltaville, VA 23043
Website: https://www.wrightslaw.com
Email: Webmaster